I quit it....

I quit, call me a quitter, I don’t care. I can't do this anymore; I have changed and not the same person anymore. So not to be rude at all, but I quit living up to your expectations and down to them. Basically I quit being bound to them, I quit following opinions that are assumed to be right for me, I quit to be loyal to these negative thoughts, stuck in my head that I can’t move forward. I quit listen to people who feel they know how well I am to live my life. I quit holding myself back living emotionally trapped wondering when will it be me. I quit the guilt of my past that blocks the good is there in the future and being judged by my past. I quit the timetables and schedules that hinder me to explore my potential. I quit self-doubt and friends who can’t place if they are on my side or not. Wondering if they will be there to show face when I have nothing in my pocket. I quit sleep walking through life and not living my dreams, I quit the fear of failure and the unknown. I am just done!

Don’t get me wrong, I am grateful for the experience and lessons learnt but I have an amazing new life lined up, I quit!

This is my resignation!

Stay True

Now, this is my job, I will not quit it. Pulled me out the depths when I thought that I was finished, yeah I questioned if I could go the distance that’s just the work, regardless of who's watching and showing me concern. Listen, see I was meant to be a warrior, fight something amongst me, leave here victorious be it in a classroom with other kids at work with my workmates. If I'd had done for the money I'd have taken a different path maybe be a lawyer. Concrete, vagabond, van telling stories

Humbled by the road, I'm realizing I'm very important, see life's a beautiful struggle, I record it as I live every day, it helps me manoeuvring through this life I live. That’s why I burn the midnight oil; I've been staring into the floor for over half my life, scared of looking up for I may tumble and fall. The time is now I will raise my head high, look up and keep the fire in alive.

A true competitor won't be satisfied, even when on top will look for way to stay there. So I guess that's the sacrifice so I will put it like this I will make the money, won’t let the money make me, I will change the game, and won’t let the game change me
I'll forever remain faithful and will stay true to cause.

I’m tired of running, so sick of whom I was becoming. It’s time to look at the man in the mirror until I can learn to love him. Give him that reason of he does not need to impress anyone but himself

dont hate what you dont understand

I'm just up from slumber I hear someone says I’m under

I am more than most rappers whose just umber

I wrote music like walking across a storm you need an umbrella

For me music has been my life my refuge I can’t be umber

I flame red, when the beat falls I flow liquid

Some piece of shit throwing shade on what I took time to build

For me this love is more than an arrow from cupid

I demolished tracks and created hits don’t mess wid

You quick to judge what the fuck you done I see?

Like Jay I don’t fall but bounce back and round ball

I moved units back then with the words that  I spoke,

I dint just say them, but I lyrically placed them on a track

Have you even been on stage with your composed song?

Fuck it! The day you write a damn rhyme find me and share your juice

All in all you pay me no mind, I was born in a battle and I forever remain one

Im a warrior in this and I don’t need you to prove it

If you have a studio and giving me a deal then speak

Otherwise shut the hole in your mouth before I break your jaw

Never hate on what I find peace and comfort in

If you feel you can do this better than me step up or keep off

You like candle under water, useless!!

As I said you pay me no mind and middle finger in the air

For I don’t give two fucks about you.

My sister my friend

My sister my friend.

It's been a painful experience and with no sleep and just lost in thought. Still wondering how you just left without notice. Anyway as much as its this painful I leave it to God.

In 1975 new year's eve my mum gave birth to her first born child. That was a bundle of joy not just to her and my dad but to the entire clan, she was the first of a kind and the first grand child to be born. Her name: Winnie Loice Atieno Rambo. A bundle of joy my grandma called her sweetie and that was the first time I ever heard that name called out to someone. My grandad called her baby. For a while it used to puzzle me why a grown child would be called baby. With a smile that never left her face she would share it with anyone who came her way. She was an only child for a reason ally long while and I showed up to be her brother. She taught me how to be man and defend myself. Being the two of us before the other siblings showed up was great. She would scare me to toughen me up and always told me to be brave. She thought me how to fight from the numerous fights we had. I learnt how to defend myself the hard way and I thank her for that. Mum raised us to be independent and she would cook and cook good. Getting home to eat her food was pure heavenly. I always knew she was there and will bath me and feed me.  One morning in a normal routine before going to school she made the and instead of having sugar in it she added salt instead. That was one crazy experience and mum would be Waiting with her slippers to correct you.

Winnie loved her sleep and would do it without question. During the apartheid in South Africa she called herself Winnie Mandela. She did admire her persistence during the struggle. I knew nothing, I was a kid who just loved his sister and her stories which would leave you in stitches always. She introduced me to Keith sweat, heavy D, Brandy, R Kelly, Babyface, SWV and my all time crush Monica. I love my music and because of her I got to know music and in it I find peace that is unmatched. When in highschool she would close school or during visiting days of her ordeals with  sister Agatha who dint  like her for everything. Including being beautiful. Talking of beautiful, men would not dare look her way. You would end up being in my Dad's wrong books and I mean he is the chief Rambo and warrior at heart.

When I finished my highschool she was already doing what she loved, being an English teacher. She had an amazing love for language and just the queens language and this is the queen of England. I went to stay with her and her family and the care she gave me was out of this world. In that state I would have missed my mum and looking for her but she made me feel at home and at ease. Any food I wanted she cooked for me.

Growing up sucks cause it keeps us away and busy to hangout as we used to. I got to university and she followed me she lived just next to my school. I would go have super most of the evenings coz I misused my pocket Money on things I can't say here. She was always there. I knew I'm covered. The last time we had time to just us we had lunch in Nairobi and as usual she bought me the lunch and we spoke close to over an hour just catching up. We grew older and stayed miles apart and didn't meet as much as we used to meet.  I will say this I hate growing up. On 9th Feb you just left with no notice and for real death picks the best and has no manners at all. You had to just take her this soon. I always knew there is an elder one who covers me. I'm so exposed Now without you. 

It's been a hard hit and a sad week for me. You gave us joy and helped me brave up. I owe so much to you. The times you washed me after school and fed me. I pray for mum for she lost her first child and nothing hurts like loosing your child. I have lost my friend one who played her role well to be the elder one. Each day will be harder but the good Lord will comfort and give me  peace. Full of love and life. You loved beautiful things just like you....may the good Lord Rest your Soul in peace.

I love girl always

It is what it is

It feels like a dream and a life I have lived before.
I strive to stop existing and live like before.
I want to be the world and a bare a free spirit like before.
I have learnt a valuable person I refer to as Mrs. Sunshine,
To make today better and stop worrying about tomorrow.
That is some good I would love to borrow.
I just to live life and find peace anyone can borrow.
I seek for joy and my heart won't stop looking.
I have lived my life for others and for what they feel is right for me.
It's never right for me, still empty in me.
I ask the good Lord to protect and comfort me.
So watch me do me and I will do it better just watch me.
Namresh you just fresh as it gets. And it is what it is.
I will make this life better.

Juliani Was Right in every way

I have read an article which is kinda throwing shade to what Juliani did on doing response to Khaligrah dis song. I am looking at this from a point of a hip hop scholar; I have spent most of my life studying hip hop as a culture and as a genre in music. I will give a small history of what hip hop means, it’s more of an intelligent movement. Hip mean to know, Hop mean a movement, we give credit to KRS One and Cool Herc opening the doors and crafting this genre of music. Without them we would not have this amazing word play of art on tracks. They paved way for the new generation artists from BIG, Tupac, Jay Z, Dr. Dre and the list is endless. Hip Hop has been raised in a battle and its deeply rooted in the battle field. It’s been an issue of what content prevails. In the 80s and early 90s the content you have is what made your music sell. Over the period artists paid concentration on what they had to put on the table and work on delivery. We know Easy E was not dope on writing and Cube did so much of ghostwriting for him, he worked on delivery and with time he could write. Memphis Bleek, his debut album Jay Z did most of the writing for him, this is because content is key in hip hop. Any great MC has to be baptized and that is done in a battle, it makes him/her better in writing and content development. Juliani is doing is responsibility as a hip hop head to keep that in place. KRS One is known to be a battle MC and he would tear anything down that came his way, it dint condemn him, I mean he is a lecture at Harvard University.

So we need to appreciate what Juliani did, I have been fan since day one when with Ukoo Flani. Truth be told Juliani is the second and most successful phase of Hip Hop in Kenya. Kalamashaka introduced Hip hop in the 254 and they showed us this this can work, this is with the likes of Hardstone. KKK did what most guys found impossible and they made it clear to be part of them it was more of what content do you have, Ukoo Flani was formed and these guys had tones of music with chizen Brain on the beat all they did was spit rhymes. Mashifta, Wenyeji, Wakamba Wawili, Juliani, Vigeti and the list is endless of amazing MCs were introduced to the industry. From K south we had Bamboo and Abbas; these are the fathers of this game. They kept the flow real and with amazing delivery.

Juliani did something which most of those artists could never do, he took Hip Hop to the boardrooms and commercialized it, and he paved way to the new generation artists who feel they own the non-existence kingdoms. He figured ways of how to make money from the amazing art he mastered; he has kept it fresh and not compromised the quality of his music. Religion aside, Juliani has a right to bring sanity to what he started and has been a successful story, he has shown us that you can spit dope rhymes and make money from it. He has mentored so many and changed lives. For someone to just step in and feel like he is nothing even for me will not go down well. Above all he is a child of battle rap and we can’t change that. He dint watch Chris brown try rap and picked the mic, he was taught by greatest. He understands the art of Rap and what it’s all about. Like a father he spoke the truth, he did not dis anyone he said the truth on the track Lord Forgive Me. He kept it 100 and that is what hip hop is all about, there is nothing wrong with speaking a truth.

A child cannot go raising his hand to his father, that’s a taboo and that child has to be punished.

White flag

I'm sitting here with my head down,

This guitar soaked in my tears, it will drown. 

I never raise a white flag, seems all is down. 

I never thought it would reach where it is. 

I was once told a white flag is saying it's them. 

At some point it's running out of choices so it remains them. 

Nothing is as bad as fight a lost battle or running a lost race. 

I have kept my clean sheet and done a good race. 

I have lost the battle and its no more the race. 

With my head down and socked book, the journey continues. 

I'm like a dog I don't speak but I understand. 

 I wish it would be  different and for once my smile be patient. 

Maybe life is never what we expect and we got to struggle some more. 

It's good to be in love, but what good does it bring if you don't get the same? 

In this battle at what point do you say it's enough and you got to fight? 

Or is it the case of the white flag? 

A white flag may mean you forever a slave and not necessarily free. 

I have had my defenses so high and i had a reason to be like that. 

The world exposes you to bad moments we end being defensive with everything. 

How can something feel so real yet it's not? 

I sit with my head down and with a soacked handkerchief I'm more confused than before. 

They say the rains fall after the sun. 

And in the sun we make hay when it's all up. 

In me I hold a heavy heart for I have lost a battle. 

As I Bury this white flag on the ground, I do it with hesitation. 

I never fail but I take this as a man and move on. 

I just never thought this would be here. 

It feels like I'm in a sand storm and i dont know when it will end. 

God who creates both the storm and I will keep me alive. 

I got eye bags not coz of lack of sleep coz of brightness of the flag. 

I have once again in a long time lost again. 

All I will do is raise my white flag and acknowledge defeat. 

This is just different.... 

Pray for the bear

Life can be a total BS,

You keep consistency and you good look but it’s never enough.

I am fighter and I keep what I value and I share my good will with all.

If I get into a fight with a bear,

Pray for the bear because

I am competitive and that’s my nature and I don’t call it quits.

At times the hard work you put the firewood you add in the fire to keep the fire up,

Someone just pours water to it. It can be very frustrating.

So many times I felt I place my weight on a rocking chair and call it a retirement,

Then I pick up myself and dust my shoulder and I keep the fire on.

I feel like I exhausted the number 23 and made a comeback with 45,

One thing I realized its not the number I wear it’s the spirit in me that counts.

I have a goal to attain and I will keep the focus,

Even if my defense checks in and I feel like fuck the world.

I am bigger than what I imagine I am.

I make impossibilities into possibilities by the grace of God.

Get low: Verse 1

This is an old time verse back in the day, Get low the single Verse 1. I was raw and rough on the mic the attraction that made me an Emcee


I am a lyricist by profession/
I take over what we call pos-session/
its not an abomination /
its more like a concentration /
to bring about arbitration /
if the rap game is falling we blame on the whack mcs of the possession/
please look at my position/
am rhyme spiting with no obligation /
and the radios are playing discrimination /
man I f eel like it’s a f**king abortion/
the whack mcs cant go beat jerking and claim possession /
this is the true restoration/
if you don’t feel me I will make you feel like after an ejaculation/
wasted like working for no compensation /
g**g* ain’t fitting its like an apology from a condom production/
hip hop is here like a resurrection/
and we taking it over with no obligation/
this is a winning com-bi-nation/

a new begining

It is a new year for me, 

a new beginning but I kicked off this year on a wrong note. 

This has to just change. 

I have lived my life with very few things to appreciate, 

been bitten too many times and this has to just stop. 

I never go for the best I settle for what fits. 

I am so done doing this, I can be settling for what is available. 

My homeboy Jay says “don’t be good be great” 

I just don’t want to be good I want to be great. 

I am so done being second and being secondary. 

I will be great and I will be number one.

Cut the chase and own the space. 
My struggle goes to my son he is the only one I owe an explanation to.
i wont kiss ass anymore, bitches dont appreciate they drain.
nothing you do goes appreciated, just criticized.
happy new year to me, that's whats up!  

word up Nick

hey bro,

its been a while, i hope you holding up well and heaven is a great place.
i am here trying to figure out how to deal with this life.
i know you watching so you know the deal, i have made several mistakes
and they are keeping me down by the day, ask God to give me another chance
i feel like i need a new page in life and start over the right way.

all in all, nothings happening that will make headlines, same old same old
i have gotten at peace since you left, i know you in a better place.
it took me a while but you always in my memories like every other time
i was just dropping some words to show you i miss you
keep the party going until we meet again bro.

another year another challenge

i know it I'm never perfect i don't strive to
this is the reality and I cant just let it to
I was hoping i would be at different place than this
all in all i give God thanks for the life that i live
each day comes with new challenges in life
i thank him for life i have lived and as i turn a new year
i will toast in the air and say cheers to me.
nothing much to celebrate about but i will just do
God's given me another year to face life
my prayer is he grants me a better year than before
i will praise you in my sorrow and my dark days
its an amazing gift i got "life"
Happy birthday to me and may God bless me!

Risen again and get this aint blasphemy

It’s too late but I learnt not to regret

I feel like a bullet pierced my heart

I don’t regret but this pain is pushing me to

I found this and I can’t even have a word for it

It was amazing; they say the best hurts the most

Shit I feel like OJ on the murder trail

Just before the harmer feel to pass the verdict

The most annoying thing I made it an addict

Damn I am so addicted like a junkie

Never wanted to be in this state of a junkie

Too late I’m hooked and I feel like a mess

The good I shared damn I just miss

I feel like I put my middle finger high

Say it loud I don’t give a fuck

But this time I do give a fuck

Damn they say the good hurts the most

I feel like a needle in a hay stuck lost!

I need to be found cause I don’t wanna fade to black

I was not called Emigee by chance,

I am a survivor, I walked the storms

And I will keep my head high, never beaten

I walk again from the low point I shall arise

This is the fucking haters who want me gone

Like Jay z I will hit the ground bounce like round ball

I wont fall, I will say it kiss my black ass I shall rise

From your shadows I will keep high

Consider me risen again and get this aint blasphemy

Momma's Day

Momma loves me, pop loves me

But this is for mums she loves me
she fed me, and she dressed me
Nyawitta raised me, and whether right or wrong
that’s my hood and gave me the right and the wrong
Momma there changed my nappies

Found me in the wrong always punished me

I can never trade anything I got from her

I was a kid all I knew was just her

The queen she is I was her prince

Cleaned my ears, washed my hair

Made sure I was neat every time I went out

My shoes polished, my clothes pressed

Damn mama you spoiled me

I made friends introduced them to mama

She treated them her own kids

So kind, so loving momma you awesome

In the dark you told me stories

Made feel I was stronger than I felt

I am lucky to have a momma

I go on my knees and I thank God

In her I found reason to life and smile on my face

I keep thinking of 9 months before September 29^th

She carried me and 30 years later she still loves me

Momma loves me, thanks for the love

I will always adore you.

This mama’s day I celebrate you

I would not have been here without you

My number one hero, mad love mum

I wont loose!

I have lived my whole live like a second best,
I have wished to be the first and the best,
I never came first in school- only this once
And I was acknowledged by the whole municipality,
That's how we called showed us the inequality.
At home I came second after my first born sister.
I live an average life and I yarn to be seen as the best.
I have struggled to come first but I always end up second best
I am told its by design and nature cause, to fall second best
At some point its more like a choice i have made to fall second
I wait when I'll be the best and regarded as the number one than the alternate.
This ain't pity coz for me I work to win. coz i am competitive
The days are young the battle is not at the peak,
The distance is not midway  and i know my streak is near.
My hope is by the time its midway I'll be on top.
I will have the last laugh and hold my head high.
I won't choose to be second best again,
I work for the top and there is where I'll stay.
I am just a man flesh and bone, I break when I reach limits.
its time to take number one, coz its so yesterday being pushed back in the line.
Just like the municipality acknowledged my greatness as number one,
I will get there coz I won't loose!

Happy 50th Birthday Jumpman 23

Michael Jordan, jump man 23.  Its been forever since you left the hardwood. You elevated the game of basketball to a different level. You made the world love the game and follow it, I remember in the 90’s on the blacktop courts everyone wanted to be like Mike. You took basketball global and because of that may new generation players enjoy what you started. You did the impossible and did it well MJ, too bad my son will just watch your games in some not so clear tapes. He may never relate to your greatness, but I will ensure he knows about it. 

You were my hero I grew up with your poster on my wall. I had no idea what the orange ball did but I knew MJ23. You dint just stop at talent but you mastered the art and the science of Basketball. I read of Wilt and Bill never saw them play, but they shine and I read stories of them and appreciated. I saw you win games I saw you lose games. I love Celtics but you made me always watch Bulls game when I had the TV to watch it. Whenever you held the ball there was always something special in-store for us. From the regular season to the playoffs, I mean you gave it your all.

You retired twice and still dazzled the world with your return, just like Larry once said you are god in disguise when you dropped 63 in Boston Garden that playoffs match up.  The coming generation of players may never know what or how you did it, but the level of intensity for the game no one can match. You never reached finals and lost, you always win. Even in those days you were the underdog you came on top. The values you gave the game are lessons that can never be taught in class. As much as I have tried to have your memories in my son’s mind, he will always just know you as legendary. I wish I would replay your career before him so he may pick the lessons I picked, because what I picked cant be taught or handed to anyone to experience. You have to see it and relate with it.

Happy 50^th birthday, there is one award I wait for you. Executive of the year and one which you deserve for taking NBA global legend of the year. Thank you for the entertainment and for the game you made us love. I wish you more years and realize the dream of having the Bobcats win a championship. That is my prayer.

God bless, and Happy Birthday MJ23

Note to my son,

On April 28^th 2010, the good Lord blessed me with you. I can clearly remember the day like it was yesterday, my eyes were filled with tears because of the joy I had seeing you.  I had never seen such a cute baby; I knew it you would be the weak point in my life. Seeing you grow and find the right for you has been a joy to me. I took an oath to the God of children that I will never leave you and its only death that will pull me away from you. My son, I work each day to be a better father and be present to your life each day that I get. I adore you and I thank the good Lord for you, I have done poems and written music for many but for you I seem to lack the right rhymes to put together.

I remember the photos from birth and each time I go thru' them and I just get overwhelmed. Bryson you my world and the reason I strive to wake up and have breath in me. I know I have not been able to give much but I have shared love with you most of the time. I will ensure your life is better each day, and I shall never sleep and leave your side. I know this life ain’t easy but my son I shall be there for you in rain and sunshine, in darkness and in light, in sickness and in health. I will teach you and guide you; I will protect you and keep you safe. I will be a pillar of hope in your life and I will hold you close to me always.

I know the good Lord has a lot of goodness for us, you my son my joy and in all I do I will always think of you. you are my world and you lite up my path with every smile you give. you intelligence is amazing, I will hold and keep by you for the rest of my life. I love you and adore you my son

Loving dad 

Emigee

It's Done

The year has ended, this thing has been comprehended

I am more in a box more like apprehended

They year’s twenty twelve and never extended

This year’s been tough but thanks it’s ended

I feel like I can do my count down to a new year

I would go like five, four, three, two, one, happy New Year!

I have learnt a lot, been in places and my goal is to do better each year

As the final days countdown to end I would just say thank God it done

I can’t sit and regret how the year’s been, I am glad it’s done

Looking forward to a new beginning a new definition

Its twenty thirteen and new with new definition

I aspire to achieve more and in my life have a new definition

I want to reach heights I never reached before

Go places I have never been before, shit more things in my pool

I go on my knees and reach to the Lord

He’s my savior, the lord of my salvation he’s the Lord

I can walk blameless and say I have never caused sin

I do intend to make next year better than ever.

Work my goals and have some direction in what I do

One thing that will never change, is my writing

I will keep the writing alive and pure

Lord thanks for the year and I am glad it’s come to end!

Radio Station

This must be, a radio station 
And who are we, we must be 
the listeners to the junk, spinning all day long 
and over again, and over again, and over again,
Sounds to me like, 
State run radio

We now interrupt this broadcast, 
to bring you a special message about the forecast, 

Wait, you got hear about the president

And every place he is be presented

He was in church then went for fundraiser

The violence prevails then after

Before it flooded with a messed up update on forecast

They call it the number one station

The state- runs radio station

Not any good compared to a gas station

The new I hear is all about pain

Over again over again and over again
the roads to peace are closed, and the traffic's on the war paths, 

The only thing said good is the president

The rest is all darkness that is presented

We need bail from the IMF, floods are killing

The riots are killing the hunger is killing

And this goes all over again, day in day out…


This must be, a radio station 
And who are we, we must be 
the listeners to the junk, spinning all day long 
and over again, and over again, and over again,
Sounds to me like, 
State run radio

You're now tuned into hours of false,

The songs played are the ones you heard the past hour 
Frequency of fear, keep you locked right here, 

You forced to just think inside the box.

The songs you heard never change limited to that

The talk shows never help,  they all talk of shit

Girls having abortions, and preach sex all day
And hope you never leave this, never be a leader, 

When have sense, the silence you

The shut the mic on you

Then we back to the president

His visits, the fun that he makes and present

The traffic is getting worse, brother died in his car

An accident on the highway, a tanker falls off

And this goes on and on, all over again

Then shit I remember this is a state run radio

So there is no hope that comes our way from it

The presenters focus on what kills us

This must be, a radio station 
And who are we, we must be 
the listeners to the junk, spinning all day long 
and over again, and over again, and over again,
Sounds to me like, 
State run radio


shit is just the same, nothing changed

I have grown my son, listens to the same

I wonder if there would be any change from the same

I did my music; it was never played on the radio

Maybe because it was not so misleading

Coz all they play in the stations is misguiding

They may have plugged off the MIC on me

But they can never kill the skill in me

It burns like wild fire; it’s like an oven door in me

I blaze still like a furnace, can never die in me

They will interrupt the broadcast

And talk about the forecast

Before you know it, something bad is in the forecast

Either it’s the rains for fall cause some floods

Or the heat to burn and dry up the land

They never give a chance to the positive to play

And the next thing is the president and his visits

Over again and over again, I got to wake up from this…